Ghosting Really Bugs Me
Posted: November 9, 2018
With today’s technology, we have a multitude of ways to communicate. You can call someone, text someone, email someone, send a message on various social media, and even fax someone (there ARE still fax machines out there). But we still have a huge communication problem!!!
I listen to podcasts and one that I have particularly enjoyed was A Therapist Walks into a Bar. Her most recent podcast was the announcement that it was ending. She talked about “ghosting” and how she wasn’t going to “ghost” us (the audience). This podcast had me thinking about ghosting. If you aren’t familiar, ghosting is a way some end personal relationships without explanation but just suddenly stop the communication.
Ghosting really bugs me. I know that I had several ghosting experiences that occurred this past summer. I honestly cannot recall who, as I write this, but I remember discussing how I just did not understand this. I was discussing with some friends and asking, “Do I do something that makes it hard to tell me ‘no’?” My experiences were not really of a romantic nature, just friend and business related, but still…..
So, how do we deal with ghosting? One thing I do is I tell myself it isn’t me, it is someone else having a hard time dealing with their own emotions. Or, and this is entirely possible in our crazy busy society, they really meant to respond and just forgot because their life got piled up with a million other things.
Another thing I do is really look to see if I have ghosted anyone. One of the values I am currently working on is being honest. Not just not lying…..but telling the truth. As I write this, I am aware of two emails that I haven’t yet responded to and I need to say, “No thank you, not at this time.” They are both sales related but I had communicated with them previously and now I’ve ghosted them. They are less than a week old and it is not too late for me to go shoot them a response. Practicing my values is a good step.
Listening to A Therapist Walks into a Bar this week was a good experience. I was disappointed she is stopping the podcast, but her telling us she was tempted to ghost and chose not was a beautiful experience. I send her well wishes and am grateful to her for the work she has shared on the podcast. I am going to strive to offer this for others I interact with and am hopeful that more will strive to do the same. I’m off to go send those emails….