How important is it that everyone likes you? How much space does this take up in your head? Is it making you crazy, thinking way ahead of what others will do and think? Are you finding some situations hard because if you do one thing, this group will like you and another will hate you? You can’t please all of the people all of the time.
The first step in letting go of this is to accept the fact that you can do everything “right,” and some people will still not like you. How do you feel knowing some people are walking around that simply do NOT like you? And they probably never will, no matter what you do. Notice that feeling and sit with it. Bonus points for looking inside and determining what it is within you that desperately needs everyone to like you. My money is on questioning our self-value and needing external validation….but if that’s too deep for you, feel free to go back to sitting with the feelings that come up knowing some will probably never like you. That is fairly deep in itself to sit and allow the feelings as you accept this reality.
The next step, if you need it or want it, is to consider that them not liking you has NOTHING to do with you. It could be they are so miserable within themselves that they project it on to almost everyone. It could be you remind them of the teacher who humiliated them in the 6th grade. Whatever it is, it is up to them to work out if and when they decide to.
And then lastly, or maybe firstly, we need to embrace our authentic selves. If we can let go of looking for everyone’s approval, that frees us up to be ourselves. When we are ourselves, sometimes amazing people show up in our lives who appreciate us and…ahem….like us.
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